Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Removing the Mask


He asked me what was wrong. I honestly didn’t have an answer for him. It was a mixture of many things, yet a paradox of none. My attempts at being authentic failed, and instead I succumbed to a paltry mirror image of who everyone expects me to be. I am your wife, your mother, your daughter, your sister, your friend, your employee…but, that’s not me.
I’d embarked on this journey before. Several times actually and this familiar route is always the same.

  • Get frustrated with my current state of affairs
  • Yell at everyone in the house just because they’re there
  • Apologize to everyone in the house for being such a bitch
  • Blame it on hormones…Aunty Flo, you know
  • Cry, scream, beat up my pillow
  • Get an earful of loud gansta rap…so you’re a badass now?
  • Reach for my essential oils
  • Meditate, Pray, put my toes in some sand
  • Kiss my husband (keeping it PG)
  • Vow to make changes in my life for the better
  • Smudge, Chant & scream my hearts desires to the Universe

The funky feel good Mojo holds me over just enough until next time. I overdose on that Spiritual fix until the next scenario, until the next ‘Oh this is bull$**!” moment. This time however, things were different. I don’t want a temporary fix. I want to be fixed. I want to be healed. I want to yell at the top of my lungs:

“Sorry that I can’t be who you need me to be today. I’m too busy being the completely delightful, eccentric weirdo that I really am when you’re not looking.”

Things are happening, and I’m excited. My Soul is filling up with so much Love and Power every day that I can hardly contain it. The Universe has recently began introducing a variety of Magical folks into my Life, and ridding me of the toxic ones. I feel strengthened as I shed the layers, upon layers of the fluff that everyone has come to know. Yes, I’m afraid of letting you see me bare, and unrehearsed. But that fear is no match for my desire to step on the opposite side of this momentary high. I have dreams that I refuse to simply let rest inside of my mind. I have goals that can’t be contained to a page on my Journal. I have a vision that won’t be regulated to one weekend a month. I have desires that don’t fit into the time left over after ten hours of running on the hamster wheel. I have a Wise Spirit who needs to break free, be me and soar….

Break out of your Comfort Zone my friends...what’s the worst that could happen? Okay, but guess what? It WON’T. Allow yourself to LIVE instead of merely going through life. Come on this journey with me. Somebody, somewhere, long ago lied to us. Someone told us that the struggle, the hustle and the misery were all a part of it. I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be. There is Zen. I refer to it as the Zen Lounge. A place where you, me, he and she can relax, reflect, and renew. I’m going, will I see you there? 

>Wise Spirit

Friday, April 14, 2017

Change is Good

On my fourteenth birthday, my grandmother gave me a bottle of a wildly popular, fairly expensive perfume. My mother hinted to her, that perhaps the fragrance was a bit too ‘grown-up’ for me. Needless to say, my teenage ego soared, and I’ve worn this scent ever since.

The other day I noticed that after spritzing my arms and neck generously with my beloved spray, that I’d broken out into hives. Large, painful welts erupted all over my arms, neck and parts of my face. It was horrible, and yet I refused to believe that my discomfort was the result of my traditional Eau de Toilette. As a precaution, I discontinued its use and vowed to recommit to it after a few weeks. Not even a few days had went by before I was drenching my skin in its delicate aroma again. Moments later, I was clawing at my skin, whimpering in pain. That was that, my love affair with Acme Fragrance B was over.

This upsetting event was yet another addition to the favorites I’d lost over the years. At the age of twenty-five, I said goodbye to dairy products after a triple scoop of ice cream left me grabbing my stomach in agony, at what felt like tiny shards of glass moving through my intestines. At the age of thirty, I had to say Adios to soda after noticing that my eyelids would jump so intensely after a few sips, that I could barely see. I took a swig of Sprite recently...it still happens. At age forty, I bid farewell to gummy bears. And honestly, it’d been easier to give up some friendships than to give up gummy bears. Anytime I eat them now (I cheat), I get one of the worse migraines ever.

And now at forty-five, I would have to alter the segment of my morning ritual pertaining to my olfactory indulgence. BUMMER! Finding a lesson in everything, I saw this as an opportunity to try a new perfume. Change is inevitable, and not always a bad thing. Just because you’ve been doing something for the past twenty years, doesn’t mean that you must continue to do it for the next twenty years. Especially if it’s no longer working for you.

Some of you right now are at jobs that you absolutely hate, but because you’ve been there for ten years...

Some of you are in stagnant relationships that are bad for your health, but because you fear being alone…

Some of you have never stepped foot outside of the city that you grew up in, but because your mamma and daddy never left the city either…

My point…pay attention to what your mind, body and soul is telling you. Don’t ignore those cues indicating that change is not only necessary, but vital. Life was not meant to be lived in discomfort.

Monday, February 27, 2017

Finding Your Tribe

I’d attended seminars, listened to webinars, and eagerly watched various podcasts. In my search for something ‘more’, I had spent a great deal of time, and money being educated by some of the leading Spiritual Gurus. I’d absorbed it all, and followed their every post, blog, and chat. Countless times, I’d felt as though I’d finally found my peeps. Those rainbow, and fairy dust folks who like me, just wanted to spread love, have fun, and encourage others.

Imagine my surprise a couple of months ago, when I got an email from one of these Gurus prompting me to be personally ‘instructed’ by them. Now, I had no delusions that this wonderful opportunity would be gratis. I understood well, that although this was her calling, it was also her business. Hadn’t I charged for my services? Wasn’t I in fact, in the process of restructuring my hobby to create a thriving business empire?  

About ten minutes into a prodding phone conversation engineered to get me riled up and onboard, she casually drops the following, “and because I believe in you, and believe that you’d truly be an awesome candidate for this unique course, I’m going to discount the regular $10,000 investment, and offer you these empowering filled lessons for only $7,000.” I was sipping on a cup of tea at the time. What I remember next, is my eyes watering as I began choking, and then blowing green tea snot bubbles from my nostrils. So as not to offend my Shero, I casually informed her that I’d have to take some time to consider her offer. Two days later, I received the following email, “some of my clients don’t know how they’ll find the funds for this life changing experience. However, those who are passionate about living their dream, and are serious about taking charge of their finances, have done the following in order to afford these courses: taken out a second mortgage, sold rare coins, borrowed from family/friends, received a personal loan from their bank.” I read the email five times before quickly blocking her on Facebook, unsubscribing from her mailing list, and exiting her online group.

After a few more hits and misses, I’d concluded that most of these Gurus could give a rat’s a$$ about nourishing your soul. Even the most casual of acquaintances seemed to be frightfully out for self. It’s really disturbing. In life, for your own sanity and well-being, you must find your Tribe. When I’d first heard that term several months ago, I didn’t fully grasp it. But I’ve come to understand that your Tribe, is a group of like-minded people who gravitate towards, and support you as you grow Spiritually and intellectually. Not to be confused with your family, friends or co-workers, your Tribe is that eclectic mix of nomads who stir your Soul and provoke your passions. Your Tribe embraces your eccentric thirst for peace, while releasing you on your solo quest for self.

I spent some time today, cleaning up my Facebook and Twitter feeds. Too much time has been wasted on one sided relationships, and clickbait switcheroos. With all of the properly positioned ‘fakeness’ running rampant in the world, nothing feels better than having a group of peeps who are unabashedly real. 

I encourage you to find, or create your Tribe today. Being weird is an Art, being weird with others is a masterpiece. 

>> Wise Spirit